reading what you wrote made me regret. i am so sorry that i didn't have enough perserverance to keep pushing you. i have always wondered whether i did enough; whether maybe if i had put in more effort like going right up to your doorstep: would that have brought you back?

your emotions were beyond what i could understand at two years ago: perhaps still beyond what i can understand now. you've been through things that i will not, maybe never, have to go through. so many things were happening at that time...i didn't even know what was going on. what was happening in your life...but i guess it's partly my fault that i never really asked, did i? sometimes, through your vague answers in our phone calls...i wonder how close you were to telling me. but the fact that you were not eventually made me lose hope. i'm sorry, i shouldn't have stopped when i stumbled.

2 years have come and gone, and it's true, it's so difficult to find what's been lost so long ago. but at least now, i can truly smile for you, because you've said that you've found your path, although it may be a hard one. i pray that you'll reach the destination one day, no matter how far away it may seem.

take care!! (:
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